The next time Zorra saw Falco, she might kill him.  Like, actually kill him.  He’d better pray that she wouldn’t have any weapons on her, because it would be so fucking tempting to just blast him into dust.  She could not believe this shit.  How the fuck did he manage to knock her up?  How was she carrying eggs?  She was a fucking raccoon!  A mammal!  Mammals weren’t supposed to lay eggs!  Yet that’s what she had saw on that screen earlier. 

Had Zorra known this was even a possibility, she would not have embarrassed herself by going to the doctor.  She never went to the doctor.  She found it to be a waste of time.  There was nothing that a handful of pills and a shot of whiskey couldn’t fix… Except this fucking stomach ache that had been bugging her for weeks.  Even as tough as she was, there was only so much vomiting, bloating, sensitivity, and cramping that she could take before she knew she had to get a professional’s opinion.

Just to find out she was pregnant.  Kinda.

Thankfully, the doctor confirmed they weren’t viable.  It wasn’t like she was going to have a litter of half-chick, half-kit abominations running around calling her mommy.  The doctor made sure to tell her it was just genetics preventing the embryos from properly developing, not her drowning them by attempting to self-medicate her debilitating stomach cramps with liquor.  (Whoops.)  That made her feel only slightly better, but that relief was short-lived when she learned that she had waited around so long to get checked out that just laying the eggs would cause less complications than trying to get rid of them prematurely.  The doctor did, however, give her something that could help speed that process along.

So, she decided to take off for a few weeks.  Told Wolf she had some business to take care of and got the fuck out of Sargasso before anyone could notice her stomach bulging underneath her big jacket.  Times like these, she was thankful that her boss didn’t give a fuck about her as long as she got results.  If she were with that team of Falco’s, she wouldn’t have even had a chance to be sick for a month before all those nosy goody-goodies start showing concern.  She popped some anti-nausea meds, hopped in the Little Rascal, and flew all the way to the fringe of the Lylat System to wait this out…  But not before dragging Falco into the mess he created.

✩

“You WHAT?”

Falco couldn’t keep his voice down when he heard what Zorra said.  He sat up in bed, staring down at her unamused face on the communicator screen.  She had to be joking.  There was no possible way that she could be carrying his eggs.

“It’s the middle of the night, Zor.  Don’t fucking wake me up with pranks like that.”

“Do I sound like I’m joking?” she said.

No… No, she didn’t.  He could hear the irritation in her tone.  He shook his head in disbelief.  He was speechless.  There were a million thoughts running through his mind.  He blurted out the one that was the most prevalent.

“Why haven’t you gotten rid of them?”

“That’s why I told you not to freak out until I finished, dumbass,” she snapped.  She sighed, running a paw over her face.  “The doc said I’m too far along.  It’d be more of a hassle on me to abort than to just pass them naturally.”

He blinked several times, attempting to process the situation at hand.

“Pass them… naturally?” he repeated.  “You mean, you’re going to lay eggs?”

“What else do you expect me to do?  Absorb them?”

He held his head in his palm, still shaking it as he tried to make sense of everything.  He supposed he was a guilty party here.  After a deep breath, he lifted his face.

“Where are you planning on hiding out?” he quietly asked, hoping his earlier outburst hadn’t woken anyone up.  “Fichina?”

“Nah, I was thinking Macbeth.”

“Macbeth?” he said.  “Why so far out?”

“No one’s going to go looking for us on Macbeth.”

Falco scoffed.  “Who the hell is going to go looking for us in the first place?”

“Listen, you’re not really in a position to question my decisions right now,” she snapped back.  “I’ll be sending you coordinates soon.  Be there or you’ll be sorry when I recover.”

With that, the transmission ended.  Falco tossed the blankets back with a groan.  He knew she meant every word she said.  Guess he was going to Macbeth…

✩

The hotel room was dark and seemingly empty when Falco stepped inside, with the only light coming from the cracked door of the bathroom.  He flipped on the light switch, finding that all the blankets and pillows were completely absent from the bed.  He had an idea he knew exactly where this was going, and he didn’t like it.  He walked over to the bathroom and knocked on the doorframe.

“Zor?  You decent in there?”

“W-What do you think?”

Though she still had her trademark attitude, he could hear the strain in her voice.  After taking a deep breath, he pushed the door open.  Somehow, the scene he walked into was both exactly what he figured and nothing he could have ever imagined.  Zorra had indeed made some sort of makeshift nest in floor of the hotel shower, but he’d never thought he’d ever see her so miserable looking in his entire life.  She propped up on pillows against, face scrunched in pain and paws clutching her gravid, lumpy looking abdomen.  Her typically fluffy fur was damp and limp from exertion.  When her eyes opened to look at him, the exhaustion was clear on her face.

“Geez,” he finally muttered.  “H-How long have you been here?”

She swallowed, racking her brain to come up with an answer.  After a moment, she shrugged.  “Dunno… Depends on what time it is…”

That answer, however vague, was enough to tell Falco all he needed to know— she’d been at this far longer than necessary.  He stripped off his jacket and tossed it onto the mattress in the other room before unzipping his flight suit and stepping out of it.  He returned to the bathroom in his undershirt and boxers.

“Y’know, I’m a better man than most,” he said as he settled by her side.  He reached for her paw and held it in his feathered hands.  “Most male birds don’t stick around for this part.”

Zorra cut eyes at him; too beat to bother insulting him.  It didn’t stop her from squeezing the hell out of his hand though.

With his free hand, Falco attempted to rub the fruits of his labor, thinking she was too weak to fight it.  He was surprised when her other paw caught his wrist and held it firmly in place.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” she growled through gritted fangs.

“Sheesh, my bad,” he said.  The corners of his beak curled up in a smirk.  “Y’know, for what it’s worth, Zor… I think you look cute like this.”

She opened her mouth to snap at him, but a contraction left her moaning in pain and clenching his hands for dear life.  Something about her sounds of agony made it all painfully real.  In all his years of knowing Zorra, he’d never seen her look so… anguished.  Falco’s expression fell somber, guilt creeping in at the part he’d played in it.

“Can… Can I getcha anything, Zor?” he asked.  She shook her head frantically.  “Just… try to relax, Zorra.  I know that’s hard, but keep breathing.”

✩

Zorra was beginning to feel delirious.  She had no idea if it had been days or hours since her labor began, but she could finally feel the eggs right against her cervix.  A whine escapes her when she realized she had already worn herself out and the worst was still yet to come.  Her head lolled to the side and she looked up at Falco through heavy-lidded eyes.  The grip she had on his hand tightened slightly as she futilely attempted to push again.

“You’re doing good, Zor,” he insisted.  “Just… push.”

A ragged cry ripped out of her throat as her body did tense and push again.  She felt the shell of the first egg stretching her as it tried to emerge.  The hold she had on Falco was nothing compared to the way her paw nearly crushed his hand now.

“You gotta breath, Zorra.”

In her agitated state, this reminder instead prompted her to hyperventilate, which was cut short when she pushed with all her strength again.  An audible pop was heard as the first egg finally emerged and landed onto the messy blankets beneath her.  She moaned in relief, collapsing back against Falco as she caught her breath.

Another contraction started as she started to relax, but this one was far less intense than the one that preceded it.  The first egg had stretched her out, so when the second was ready to emerge, it just popped out with little effort in comparison to the first.  Each one that followed was easier than the last, and after a few long hours, they were left with a brood of six in total.

“That’s… That’s it…”

Her voice was barely above a whisper, completely shot after the day she’d had.  Her eyes were heavier than ever, and her head lolled as Falco did his best to clean her up somewhat.

“B…Babygirl…”

The hoarse sound of his pet name was enough to bring him to attention.  He stopped what he was doing and looked down at her.

“Hm?  What is it, Zor?”

She took in a deep breath, unable to even hold her eyes open any longer to look at him.

“… I… oughta kill you… for that…  You know…”

This caught him off guard, but Falco managed to keep his face straight.

“Yeah, I do know,” he said, brushing her damp fur back between her ears.  “Get some rest, Zorra.”